golf mom,
Here is a thread that I posted quite a while back on pursuit and distance. It may help you.

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=714209

Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.