mr. bond, thanks. maybe i will have to do that. but if we can resolve this, he usually doesn't hold a grudge, but we'll see. May have to figure out the tv stuff. Barely floating did!.
JS. I peeked at the drama triangle, too tired to really digest it, but i put it in my favorites for when I don't have 400 things to do for this move!
Haven't been here in awhile. Lot's has been happening. Moved out, worked out a settlement with H. I think it's fair. The signing will happen next week. It's a lot take in. Spent a couple days with h. He helped with the move. And dealt with all my electronics. Felt good to be around him. Now it is really sinking in. Trying to take it one day at a time. I'm just wore out. Haven't done anything today to unpack. Giving myself a break. Can't really look ahead. Don't know if after signing, h. will even ever want to see me. So that's where I am. Sorry there is nothing uplifting in this post.
hopeless.. give it a couple of days to settle in. you're in a new phase.. a new environment.. it's got to be overwhelming. now that you're in your new place.. once you're settled in, it'll be a good time to start thinking about all those things you want to do to GAL! what do you want to do??
Me:38.. H:33. Two beautiful kids S:6 D:3 M:8.. together for 11. Bomb dropped:10/17/11 Separated:11/07/11
Hope, one day at a time. Do a little more for yourself each day. Grieving is normal, to my thinking necessary.
XW left and I did not wash the sheets for weeks. The scent of her was important to me. Eventually you let it slip past and move forward, not move on, that may be later, just forward, get stronger, better.
The opposite of love is indifference. H did not marry someone he was indifferent to. He will think from time to time. He may not let you know he has. He has his own path to walk.
Please do not be concerned about uplifting posts just now those too shall come.
BITS Me 55, ACK, when did that happen? Doesn't feel like 55 D 30 S 27
You create your own universe as you go along - Winston Churchill
Well haven't posted in awhile. Came to a settlement with l's, signed papers, judge will sign off tommorrow and a marriage of 17 years will be over. All in 4 months. I'm just worn out right now, unmotivated to unpack stuff in this place I don't want to live, not looking forward to finding a job after 6 years of "retirement", just hard to believe he didn't want to be married to me so much, wouldn't do MC, and put us both thru all of this. I know I have to believe, but it is still such a struggle. I know everyone says it will get better, work on yourself, gal, right now I barely feel like doing anything. I think I just need a mental break. It's so hard to work on crap when you feel like you just don't care. I know I'm down. I try to not attach to much significance to the days, (papers signed, judge signs, the end) but I guess I do. Will give myself some time to wallow and then try to kick myself in the butt! GM you are a god to me, I don't know how you do it man!
So sorry!! You have every right to feel the way you do. I wish I had more words of encouragement but just know that I am feeling very much the way you are and it does feel hard to move forward. I think you're right, you do need the time to grieve. It's expected. Surround yourself with people that love and support you. Hopefully we can all see the light at the end of the tunnel... sooner, rather than later.
Take care of yourself!
Me: 32 H: 32 M 9 yrs #1 D7 #2 S5 #3 D2 Bomb 8/12/11 H moved out 8/14/11 PA started w/H & OW in 1/12 - found out 3/24/12 Got my own place 8/25/12 H & OW move in together 9/15/12 Still married.
Thanks JKS. I feel like I've been hit by a train. I think it's going to be awhile before I even feel normal, much less better. But friends do help. Both my kids live out of town, so I missedthem today. Got cards and phone calls but man hugss would be good right now! It just hurts so much that the person, who was "your" person for so long could give a crap about you anymore. Uggh, ok enough pity party. Should just go to bed and try to sleep. Thanks, again.
