I will probably get a DB coach sometime in the future. I am seeing an IC through my husband's work insurance right now, so going that route for a bit. I can't afford the DB coaches yet, but I will make definitely do that if it gets down to last resort time and he is filing paperwork, etc.
I know what you mean about pushing your buttons. I used to feel I was overly sensitive to some things my husband would say that caused me to feel insecure, but I am starting to see a few behaviors in there that I think may be intentional. I know better than to second-guess his motivations, but I am really starting to see a pattern of when I am happy, he has a few things he does to take it down a notch. When I feel more upset, he seems like he is happier around me. I have noticed it a couple of times where he says something kind of out of nowhere that he knows would probably hurt or get a reaction and then yesterday, he did it twice right before we were leaving. I am really trying not to let it get to me and just blow it off and keep on with the positive attitude. I felt like crying most of the way home yesterday, but I don't show that to him. I never would have thought he had that in him before, but now that I am seeing a lot of sides of his personality I hadn't realized were there, I'm starting to see some of that too. It is a little empowering, because I feel it is a sign I am gaining a little perspective on his true personality and not just attributing this whole mess to me. But it is unsettling to realize if he is that kind of person, there is probaby more, and it is making me think will we ever be able to fix this and get a good marriage put back together out of all of this?
M 36 H 36 D9,S6, Expecting D in August 2012 M 13 T 18 Told me he wanted to separate 12/31/2011 Moved Out 2/2/2012 Didn't want to work on things, wanted divorce 4/20/2012
