Saga from yesterday: I went off on H over the phone about his A yesterday, when I should have just kept my mouth shut. I was having severe back pain, and I was in a FOUL mood. I knew I shouldn't have said anything, and ended the conversation by saying,"Never mind, just forget I said anything. I know this is something I have to deal with on my own."
By the time I got home, he was asleep on the couch (or pretending to be sleep). This is one of his tactics whenever we usually argue. I just dropped my stuff off in the kitchen and headed to lay down myself. Took a quick nap, but didn't really rest because of my back.
And here's where I start looking at him like he has 2 heads, or as I like to call it - "the side eye". i got up from my nap, and we actually ended up hanging out a bit and watching some TV together (Kevin Hart on Modern Family...HILARIOUS!) He's offering to give me a back massage or go grab me some dinner. We both want to see "The Avengers" this weekend, but of course I have to see all of the individual movies first. LOL I haven't seen "Thor", so he searches on Netflix, OnDemand, etc. to see if he can find it. Figures out Red Box has it. I say okay, I'll go by there tomorrow.
This morning, he asked if I have any cash. I say no, but I need to go to the bank today anyway. He says he can run to the store before work (which will make him late). I tell him it's up to him. He comes back with cash, AND the movie "Thor". I said Oh wow, thank you!"
I do KINDA feel bad that I chewed him out yesterday. It was like I couldn't stop myself. I think deep down I'm REALLY annoyed and angry at him for being so nice, helpful, etc. He wants to leave, so why do all of this stuff? It confuses me. DETACH, DETACH, DETACH!
Need to work on just being quiet a lot more. And remembering that I can only control ME.
