Thank you SIW - it helps to know that others are on the same cycle. I hope things turn around for you. At a bare minimum, she has noticed your changes. Looks like you have only been at this since March or so, so that is a good spot to be in. Work on making them last. Which, I will tell you, if you are doing it right will probably hurt like hell.
As for me, today has been kind of rough. I am praying for more peace and patience because lately I feel like I have been working so hard and not really getting a lot back. I know that things have gotten better relative to where I started, but I still feel as if there has yet to be one true moment when W says she is 100% committed to working on things. At the moment, it seems all that she is committed to is the divorce.
It is a difficult things to process - working so hard on changes, being better, relating better to W and she seems to only be working on divorce. Maybe I am being dire here, and maybe I am just exhausted from effort and not seeing the big picture of all that I have accomplished over time. But today, I feel as if I am all give and no get when it comes to my situation. I know that in signing up for DBing, that I was signing up for doing most, if not ALL, of the work. It's just hard to keep that in your memory when for so long you toiled under the impression that two people have to work at it AT ALL TIMES. Some days in this process, you just want her to give up.
DB is a tremendously challenging thing to do. For me it is right now, anyway. I am doing my best to gut it out but if I have several days in a row like today I don't know how I will be able to keep it together.
If this was the type of pain that I was putting my W throught without knowing - "I'm sorry" doesn't even begin to cover it.
