Not getting much work done today, but have re-read my posts and got caught up with other posts as well. From what I gleam from my sitch and others is that our WAS can and do change on a dime and talk out of both sides of their mouths.
I also read Michelles articles on the site and what got my eye had to do with the love quiz and question number 5 "People Just Fall Out of Love." That is one thing that resonates with my W, for her its all or nothing. While Michelle says that this is one of the funniest things she has ever heard. She is stressing that couples need to spend time together. I am trying to do this, but have to understand that she is the captain of the date ship right now. I also looked at our first scrap book and remembered what we did when we first met and how I approached/treated her when we were first getting to know one another.
W has told me that one of the things that hurt her the most was the feeling that I was not there for her. When this came up I listened and validated. When she was nervous about her health I told her I was here and was helping her before she had to ask.
I am trying to look at her as a roommate and treat her accordingly because I think being detached from her would back fire since I was "detached" for a good period of time in our marruiage.
I also made a list of what "good" things occurred in our marriage and was on page 5 when I stopped writing. I think that when I start to get sad I need to look at this list rather than letting my bad thoughts take over.
I threw out the idea of going on another date on Friday. Sorry to post so much and often.
