I found this site last week late one night. I am so glad I did. I really think my husband may have some of the midlife crisis characteristics. Funny thing is I never considered it until I saw this site. Funny thing is that it was a revelation that yes, we are that age. We have been married 4 years together for 5. We have a 5 1/2 month old son. About a month ago during a walk in the park he tells me he is not happy, has been seeing a therapist and not sure he wants to be married. WTF!!! It was an utter shock. I totally can see how someone can say they had no clue. I had no clue. He said couldn't I tell something was up with him. Yes, no, I am not sure cause I was dealing with being pregnant (hormones) and now dealing with a lack of sleep, breastfeeding, hormones (lack of), changed body and all the pleasures of just giving birth and going back to work full-time. The final kick in the gut was that he says he has felt this way for a few years. Seriously, WTF!!! During all our conversations about having a kid, this just never happened to come up. He stated he thought having a child would make him feel better. Speechless!!! I am glad I found the list of things not to do. Kind of late, cause I did a few of them, but oh well. I am glad I found the list of things to do. I have been going places and not even inviting him. I have not ready any of the books yet. The talk of the big D has not come up. I did state that I wanted a chance to have my say in whether this marriage works or not. I said we need to see a therapist and he is open to that. But I am the one who must do all the research. The feeling of limbo [censored] the most. I am pissed at him that he felt this way for so long and still agreed to bring a child into this world. I am not sure I could ever forgive him if my son grows up with divorced parents. I find it hard some days to see the positive. I feel like my best friend has been lying to me all these years. But maybe this is just part of his midlife crisis issues (he turned 40 six months ago). I feel guilty because at times I think our son can see the grief on my face and he looks at me with such serious eyes. Anyhow, I look forward to reading the information and gaining more understanding and knowledge and I pray we get through this and make our marriage stronger.
