Antlers: It is not about what we know of your situation - if we don't know enough - it is because you were not willing to share that info. No one can help you without the whole story BUT...
What we DO know is that your children need guidance and intervention. YOU should know this from your career and also from your heart. Some of us are in careers where we have to report such incidents. You continue to act from a "victim" mode, not from that of a concerned parent. To continue to NOT do the right thing, to step in and take control or even to waste your time trying to communicate with the other parent who clearly DOES NOT GET IT is acting in a neglectful manner. If you don't think it is abusive - then let's call it neglect. But what difference is the word - the tragedy is similar.
Months have gone by since you first made us aware of your children collapsing yet you continued to write about your own feelings and how you "forgive your ex" while not dealing with the big problem. It's like adding fire doors to your house when it is already burning to the ground.
Do you want your kids kicked out of school permanently? Arrested? Killed in a car accident? Overdosed? On welfare?
Do you EVER watch Dr Phil??? There are programs to reach out to these kids. You MUST know that from your work. If not - you need to go to the school and forget about getting your ex online with you. Clearly the kids best interests are not what her concern is.
I wonder why I waste my time worrying here when you don't
