Actually there is no distinction. Unfortunately you don't have any control over this.
I don't have any control over my wife, and my daughter has absolutely zero control over how someone else's choices impact her life. I do have some control over mitigating that situation, and trying to protect her. I mail but I have to try...
Quote:
Ok......but why do you ASSume this has something to do with her spending a single night with your wife at OM's house, rather than with her traveling halfway around the world to a foreign country and being separated from you for a long trip?
I didn't assume that and I'm pretty certain I never said that. Although I might have inferred as such I'm simply not taking any chances.
Quote:
I know you don't like that your D expresses these things to you and how how you feel about it.
Or
Who you choose to blame for it.
the fact remains
Your W is her mother and always will be. She might not always act as you would like or
act like a wife.
That's a huge thing I struggled with probably for a long time after this whole mess began. You're right. I shouldn't place my expectations about parenthood, or views on 'morality', on my wife. I just personally feel that, in regards to the kids safety and security, there comes a point where a parent should intervene. I don't believe any sensible parent would simply ignore the 'cries for help' from a young child, simply hug and comfort them and say "don't worry, it will all be okay", and then continue to sit and watch and let [bad] things happen that obviously have a negative emotional/psychological impact on their own child.
From what I recall and read of your posts, you've always come across as a very insightful person TrueGrit. I wonder if you'd be willing to share your thoughts on this:
I find it paradoxical that the people who post on this board, who obviously are struggling with a major life-changing event, predominantly seem to take a very passive stance towards my question [about my daughter] - i.e. "don't put her in the middle", "you have no control over the situation", etc...
On the other hand, every 'intact'family I've spoken with (and I've asked a lot of families the same question I've posted here) advocate things like telling my lawyer, confronting my wife, etc...
