My Story/Mixed Messages...

[2012sf]

Up this morning getting ready for the prenatal appointment and drive. I've been reading a lot of other people's situations and trying to find pieces to take out and apply to mine. It's hard finding one that seems to mirror the amount of contact we have with the way he is so set on divorce though. Anyone know of one that sounds familiar to mine?

I am trying to think of some light interesting conversation we can have on the way over. I feel like I just ask him about work, his stuff going on and don't have much to talk about on my side. Not that he really asks or seems to care a lot. We talk about the kids and joint things, but I know I need to appear more out there and like I am something different than just a housewife sitting around the house. I'm not, I have a lot of activity going on, it's just not very exciting stuff. Or something he would care about talking about. lol My biggest project right now is the nursery. Again, kid related, and he helps with moving stuff when I need it, but not really interesting to him to talk to me about.

I know a lot of this is his attitude when we are together. He has that wall up and it makes me uncomfortable. He is not that kind of guy normally. He is usually a big cut-up, talking, into whatever, and this formal guy that doesn't make eye contact as much and doesn't initiate any topics is just really throwing me for a loop. I'm starting to get scared that if I don't bridge that somehow, he is going to get worse and just say he doesn't want to be around me and wants to arrange kid drop off and thats that. Feeling pretty discouraged right now. And I know I'll have two times today to spend around him, so I need to get it together. A discouraged girl isn't going to be the kind of girl he is going to think about being around.