Thank you, Sandi. I just printed two copies of that prayer and they are going on the mirror in my bathroom and on my fridge.
There is nothing I can do about any of it. The problem with being somewhat of a type-A personality, you always think that there is a way to fix everything....a way to achieve anything you want if you work hard enough and focus on it. Sadly, as it comes to love and emotions - this is just not the case. A person (me in this case) will bloody their head on the wall trying to make it happen. I am a living example, and yet somehow I think I am the one that can be the first to outsmart it. I guess it's that "never give up" attitude. I guess I partially believe that if I let go and give it to the D that it is the equivalent of giving up on my marriage. I know that I KNOW better than that - it's just a hard correlation to break.
I want to remain consistent....upbeat and positive with my W - but right now, I just want to be away from her until I can get a better grip on my feelings and make peace with the divorce and all that it will take away.
