So I went to dinner tonight with W and S - her idea. We had a pretty good time together - R talk came up - not my doing. She knew I was having a slightly rough weekend and she asked if it was about the D and if I ever get mad at her. I said no. She DID say that the D is probably going to happen. No shocker there, but still hard to hear.
Regarding dating and such she said "you set the bar pretty high". I asked what she meant and she said that "there aren't a lot of guys out there like you". Half joking, half not - I said that there's me sitting right here. She responded "yes, but we have major issues". She said she was open to working on them - I just said so was I.
I will never understand. How can she be so complimentary like that, that I am "so handsome", such a good father, "set the bar so high" - and yet say that the divorce is "probably" going to happen and that we have major issues. I don't think any of our problems are/were out of the ordinary for couples in our position. I guess I define "major" as something very different.
I am still sticking by my changes no matter what. And if she does not want to be with me, then I guess it is her loss. I am a good man that made stupid relationship mistakes - not out of hate, not out of malice, but because I simply did not know. It was never because of a lack of love. My heart hopes that she can see that and forgive and be willing to try again.....but I can;t control it. It breaks my heart, but there is nothing I can do.
