Hi ncl, Thanks for the positive perspective on my D16's anger outbursts. I hadn't thought of it like this, but you're right, poor kid does have to vent somewhere. She has been acting better towards me since that morning, too.
Good to hear about the cycle you can see in my H's behaviour, too. I need to stop enabling this sort of thing. If I can just swing the money to get some legal clout behind my requests that we separate finances, things will get better, I'm sure.
On the point of him saying he still wants a D - he's not often used this term. His big word is separation. And he seems to want to keep working to his 5-year plan for keeping finances shared. But once or twice he has threatened D - if i don't do what he says with regard to money.
I swing between seeing his plan as an indication that he is still conflicted about really cutting loose from us, and seeing it as a selfish ploy to prop up his business.
Thanks for putting up with my wheel spinning. I feel that i am getting better at living life as if he's gone - not there completely yet, but more detached than i used to be. Just trying to wait it all out and keep the road home paved and smooth. (It's all SO classic MLC). I do benefit so much from hearing how you see my sitch. So thanks again for giving so generously of your time and care.
