I guess I can be here now 2

[KenF]

sorry, hit submit instead of preview, i had some editing to do. hate the inability to edit.


Everyone works at their own speed, as a professional you know this. but it seems as if you're demanding him to work at your speed, under your conditions. But you know that wont work. you cant force that on your clients, and you cant force that on him, and the pressure you put on him works against you.

but you keep trying, and you simply frustrate you.

there are lots of crazy emotions that go into impending fatherhood.

there is real fear there, fear of becoming your father (if you grew up never wanting to be your father) or fear of not being your father, or not being a good father.

there's the feelings of going from being the most important person in your W's life to being a third wheel type. as soon as your W gets pregnant, the H is pushed way back. now everything is about her and the baby. "your job here is done, now shut up and carry her bags"

no one ever complements a father to be.

a H gets no attention anymore, from anyone. everyone fauns over the mother and her belly.

and all those things cause people to do things outside of their normal behavior. so there's no answer to why H did what he did.


and none of that means he'd do it again. or that he did it at all.

and framing your emotions that he ruined your pregnancy is only hurting yourself.

i got the something similar from my x because i went home to sleep and shower as she was resting in the hospital. so when they brought the baby in to feed at 4am i wasnt there. and even though at midnight the night before x and MIL both told me to go home, to this day "i ruined her birth night because i wasn't there to bond"

of course she didn't think that until she was justifying her PA


but maybe i'm just projecting onto you/him.

its your choice how you view these things. you can choose that it was all ruined, or you can choose that it was just a minor glitch or anything in between.