Wow! I guess things have gotten considerably worse since we last heard about what was going on in your life. So what is your plan?
If your ex is bailing on the kids, then it would seem like it is time for you to assert parental control. Do you need to go to the courts for that to make it official? If so and even if the kids don't want it or like it, that is probably the smart thing to do.
Once you get custody of the kids then you will obviously have your work cut out for you in terms of getting them under control and behaving like responsible people. I don't envy you, it ain't going to be easy!!!
There is a program called "thetotaltransformation" that is an excellent tool for working with and correcting defiant behavior in children and teens. The program cost a few hundred bucks but may possibly be picked up off of ebay for less. It is a series of CD's that provide step by step ideas and solutions for addressing the kinds of behavioral problems you are dealing with with the kids.
Most importantly, and I'm sure you know this, the children need your love and discipline; someone who gives a sh!t. It doesn't seem that your ex. is capable of providing that so you get the prize.
Take a look at www . thetotaltransformation . com it may be just want you need at this time.
Good luck, Antlers!
Me51 W53 S17 S14 M22 T25 Bomb-9/11; A-11/11; I move out 11/11
It's easy to find our bottom, it is our top that requires cultivation.
Every rough spot adds to our emotional constitution. -Barney Fife
