I'm guessing that one of the reasons letting go is so hard is that I have a need to control out of fear. This is one of my H biggest complaints. I'm really trying to understand this need and where it comes from. In my M I thought of myself as just taking care of what needed to be done, but in my H's eyes he had no say in anything. I believe he's doing a lot of projecting, but there is truth in what he said. This is one of the reasons he says he is afraid to come home. He believes that I will be different for awhile but will gradually fall back into old habits. This is an area of growth for me that will serve me well the rest of my life. If anyone knows of good books/articles on this I would really appreciate some recommendations. This is something I had started working on in therapy and learned it came from my fear of abandonment.
I'm going to need to pray every moment I can to get through this day.
