I don't know her. So I told H that even if I did approve, I would want to meet her before she stayed alone with our kids.
I'm also not crazy about H sleeping with OW while the girls are in her house. He sort of agreed that was a bad idea...but then later said it wouldn't be reasonable for them to sleep apart for a month. Keep in mind our girls very frequently like to crawl in bed with us.
He can't take them under the divorce filing...I have to give permission for them to go out of state.
It's just a very stressful, hurtful distraction.
NB,
Your concerns are not selfish, petty ones. They are valid. The ball is in your court; as you mentioned, he needs your permission to take them out of state. Until you are comfortable with that, hold tight to your boundaries and standards. This is still very early in the D process (even though your sitch has been ongoing for some time), so don't feel rushed to make any decisions right now.
Believe me...I know this is VERY stressful and VERY hurtful, but you are doing great. Hang in there.
