sorry i haven't replied for so long - when i read your post - i knew that i wasn't in the state of mind to really hear what you were saying - i'm not sure i am completely in it now either
sigh...
h pulled me into a conversation today and even though i have spent the whole week before this, really working on not reacting, i found myself feeling a bit crushed by the conversation
i'm reading MWD's chapter on last resort technique tonight - and then really wondering:
is it pursuing or chasing in some form, when i say to h "i respect that you don't want us to be together, even though i would prefer to see us work it out?" is that putting pressure on him and chasing him?
am i sabotaging my own efforts?
interesting pattern here: every time i do a significant 180 - we have this messed up conversation which doesn't go anywhere.
except then, this time, he's insisting that we talk - is that a baby step?
is he just checking the temp as they say?
me 46 H 38 M10yrs T 11 S10 BD ow 8/11 h filed 9/25/12
"if i could define enlightenment briefly, i would say it is the quiet acceptance of what is"
