WHG: Looking for the shrinking cake

[workinghardguy]

SD's rollerskating party went better than I had thought it would. Just kept the "as-if" mentality in force throughout the day.

A humorous moment came when S was first trying to skate. He's never rollerskated before and he's only six. So he was struggling and freaking out. First I tried to help him, then my W tried. He finally agreed to skate around as long as W held his hand and I held his other hand. So there were the three of us going around the rink looking like the prototypical family. Go figure. When S first said he wanted us to both hold his hands I could tell it frustrated my W. After a few times around S went of to play on the indoor playground. However, a little while later he wanted to try again. This time W didn't fret as we went around.

S rode with me so as we got done I asked W what her plans were. She was going to go home and nap after SD's friends were picked up, and have S and SD (SS was with grandpa) watch TV or movies while she napped. So I asked if I could take S and SD since W would be sleeping anyway (W worked until 8am that morning). She said that was fine so we all headed back to my place. S and SD helped me plant most of the vegetable garden.

A while later SS texts me and asks where everyone is at. Grandpa brought him back early so I said mom was sleeping. He asked if he could come over so he did. He wanted to mow the yard since I pay him $10 for it So my FIL brought SS over and then he stayed and visited with S and SD for a while. He and I caught up and talked about guy stuff. No mention of anything... those convos are sort of surreal.

Evening ended with W asking if she could park at my place so she could walk to her bellydancing. She wanted to park at my place since she needed to get the kids afterward anyway. SD went with her to dance and then about 30 minutes later SD texts me and asks if I'd come get her.

Funny moment happened when W came to my place after dance to pick up the kids... she comes in and asks in a panicked voice, "did the kids get fed?" Umm... yes, it's 7pm, I wouldn't starve them. W had made a crockpot meal but forgot about it and about feeding the kids. Which was fine, they were with me.

So I got a bunch of time I hadn't planned on having with all three kids so that makes a good day. SD had fun. Her friends thought I was funny. I overheard one of her friends telling her that she wished her dad would come to her birthday parties at her mom's.

I still struggle with feeling like I'm enabling my W too much. Like taking the kids while she napped makes it easier on her. And it does. But I have to take time as I can get it so I battle with myself.