Instead of being reassuring in our ensuing discussion, H was obviously unsure again, I told him that if he wasn't really going to work for our M, then he just let me know and we should just call it quits.
Of course, whenever we come to that point, H just could not committ. To anything, for that matter. He was just all "I could not make that decision, because I don't know. If you want that, it is YOUR decision."
Angel,
I'm sorry for your setback. I know this isn't easy, but you've got to make it clear to your husband that "no decision IS a decision" . . . and it's HIS, and he needs to own it.
"I cannot, and will not, remain in a marriage where my husband is still having inappropriate contact with another woman" is either a real boundary with you, or it's not. Throughout your ordeal (and yes I've followed along), I think your husband has come to the conclusion that the status quo -- the dreaded "limbo" -- is acceptable to you. He knows that you'll SAY that it isn't, but other than a lot of tears and anger, I think he knows you won't DO anything about it.
