Learning as I go

[tested metal]

Update-

I retained a L yesterday because I was getting pressured by W's L for contact info. so she could file opening complaint.

Within an hour of getting the L, my L called me telling me that the OM's assault was on W, while D1 was in the apartment. Apparently he hit her, pushed her to the ground, and slapped the phone out of her hand while she truied to call 911. Then W locked herself in D1's room while D1 was sleeping in there and waited until police arrived.

Needless to say I am a little unnerved that this happened to W and I am concerned for her. I am also angry that she put D1 in that position by living with the D-Bag in the 1st place.

The silver lining is that if W tries to get full custody, her chances will be slim now due to this incident and the people with whom she associates.

I am noticing myself crying more and getting it out of my system as although W is very nice to me, like old W used to be (probably to distract me from the assault, she does not know that I know about it), she is still pursuing the D.

I do realize know that W has major issues regarding her self esteem as efore I met her she went out with abusive guys. She said I was her prince and was completely different. Then she dumped me for another abusive D-Bag. I guess that is what she will have to work out in life.

As for me I now see how I tried to overcompensate for her past by avoiding conflict and not wanting to be lumped in with her past abusive boyfriends. This led me to be more passive and allowed her to have too much control over the relationship and frankly...me.