We've been together for so long its hard to think of it ending like this.
ND, none of us planned for our marriages to end. Each of us was shocked with some aspect of the bomb. Look at my handle.
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After seeing her last night, I'm wondering if I can ever make her happy again.
You cannot make her happy. It is not within your control. Her happiness is her choice based upon her perceptions. The best any of us can do is choosing to be happy ourselves.
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I've got to keep working on myself and hope she will she the changes.
Work upon yourself for you. Make your 180s your 180s for yourself, for your happiness. You are not running away from her, you are running toward yourself.
When I began I was trying to demonstrate change for each of those things W gave as reasons for leaving. None of this was effective for these were surface changes attempted and specifically targeted to win her back.
My happiness did not begin to return until I began to work on me. When I understood how our dynamic evolved, and when our codependency started was when I could begin to target my 180s.
Each situation is different though there are common themes through many of them. This cannot be Band-Aid fixed, this must be understood before corrective and preventive solution can be applied. Keep in mind you can only fix you.
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We'll see after the next two months.
Use care setting timelines in my experience they indicate expectations. This takes as long as it takes. Use the time you have to your best advantage. Engage in activities that move you forward
BITS Me 55, ACK, when did that happen? Doesn't feel like 55 D 30 S 27
You create your own universe as you go along - Winston Churchill
