It's like how the parent of an infant thinks they have it hard, and the parent of two toddlers thinks they have it hard, and the parent of three teens thinks they have it hard. It's hard for all of them, and our pain is experienced only on our own personal scale. While for me Ro's anniversary day would be the best one I've had in years, I understand that she is not happy.
On the other hand, I can't imagine the pain of knowing my H had sex with another woman, because I don't know for a fact that has happened and so I choose to ignore the possibility. Ro can't ignore what she knows.
Ro, you're entitled to feel angry and hurt and disappointed. If you can process those feelings without acting on them, and give them time to settle in, you may eventually come around to appreciating what was good there. By the way, with his knee pain how'd he get the roses? He put some effort into recognizing the special day. He may still want to end your marriage, but then he hasn't moved out...why not? He acknowledges that you're having tough times, that's honest. Being reactive, acting out of emotion, throwing out the good because it isn't good enough, you can choose to do these things or choose not to.
Glad you got cute outfits - that's great!
Adinva 51, S20, S18 M24 total 6/15/11-12/1/12 From IDLY to H moving out 9/15/15-3/7/17 From negotiating SA to final D at age 50 5/8/17-now: New relationship with an old friend __ Happiness is a warm puppy.
