waiting for the other shoe

[JustStunned]

ND, A big part of detachment for me was finding ways to take my focus off what my W was saying and doing. A big part of DB for me was focusing upon myself and improving what I could about myself. You can only take responsibility for yourself and your actions at this point. Focusing upon what she is doing will prevent you from focusing upon yourself.

Accuracy posted about “The Three Faces Of The Victim” IMO a google search of this will be more productive than focusing on what your W is saying or doing or on the OM. IMO we all find ourselves upon the triangle at points in our lives, some get stuck.

Cadet posts a series of links that are a wealth of information. Right click his name while logged on and find them. Or Cadet if you see this could you post them here.

Over on MLC there is a thread of resources in a sticky at the top of the first page. Not that your W is in MLC or not, just much of what can be found there is useful.

Please read DB and or DR again, please shift the focus to what you can control, to what you can improve, to self. There is weeks of information to sift through. One can only absorb it so fast and doing so requires focus.

Lastly, I did the rubber band snap on my wrists for months as means of stopping angry and obsessive behavior.