From what you've posted, I think I can see why she chose you...
Why did you choose her? What qualities about her did you like... that attracted you to her?
You mentioned you got "lazy"... what about "lazy" was serving you? Avoiding the R or her? Or were you wallowing in self pity, looking for her to come in and love you? Letting you know that you are important? Or was there other ways that you were meeting your needs by being lazy?
She left the cats with you? Then it certainly does not seem she is done with you. It's one thing to leave a couple old books or shoes or tools that are easily replaced... but leaving the cats? Living, breathing, animals...? I'm guessing of course, but it is possible she's either left a part of her to comfort you during her time away... or she has a reason to re-connect with you once she's "figured things out"...
Not sure, but it sounds like you are making a big deal that she now wants to move elsewhere... Could be wrong, but it seems you are attached to your place...
If that's the case, what makes you think that she would simply be willing to get rid of her place in town, move in with you, and be happy...? Aside from the words, I mean...
Did you really think she was a rural chick at heart?
She bought property that she thought the two of you might build on, once your place was fixed up and sold... sounds like she was nesting... a place to call "ours"... not "her place" and "my place"...
What makes you think she's ambivalent? Because of the words she used...?
Consider maybe she was testing your commitment to her. Maybe this and maybe that? Sure, we all are capable of being unsure... but if we really don't want someone else' opinion... those aren't generally thoughts we share...
Maybe... just maybe... all she wanted to hear from you was that you were still committed to her... and then you would step in and be there for her... like you said you would...
