Thank you guys. I really really appreciate your wisdom and the time you took to post to me.
Andabelle.....Yes my nephew is with me. He keeps me on my toes. lol I am thankful so much that I have him to keep me busy. Being alone [censored]! Well sometimes anyway.
AJ....You are so right about young boys needing their fathers. It's their mothers when they are young though. I also know my son knows better and no he has cut me out of his life thats true BUT I dont want to prolong that. I have waited over 2 yrs. thats a much longer wait than waiting on the MLC to come around.
Brookie.....I know there are still many people here that give good advice and I know that I was a mess during all this and prb made some of them scream a time or two (maybe still do). AND I know we all need pushing. BUT to call me an outright liar basically. Not in those words but Fig made me feel as if I was lying. I have no reason to lie. I don't contact my xh and if I feel like I have too (which ends up wrong), its for a good reason. I know we all mean well. BUT gee enough is enough sometimes. Yes push me but dont call me a liar. My divorce will hurt for yrs prb. It touched many more details of my life other than just MY MAN LEAVING. Its so much more than that and you know that. Snodderly is the other one I spoke about. She helped me so much along the way adn i am sure she got aggrigvated. BUT it seems when one incident on here where I asked for Sandy's advice, Snodderly quit posting to me. I have tried to talk to her because I am bothered about this but she refuses adn I think that is so childish. If I have offended any of you PLEASE at least tell me why you no longer post to me. It may be that I really need that advice and you may have the right answer. BUT to ignore me is not the way to do it. I am just that way.
About my son. Brookie I dont want to prolong him staying away any longer. I am between a rock and a hard spot. Do you know how hard it was for me to ask son to go stay with his Dad? I did it with tears streaming down my face and cop friend standing there with us. Do you remember? I have questioned myself since then. I took the advivce from many here and did that. I am not blaming anyone but I should have listened to my heart. I dont want to make that mistake again. Again I am saying I AM NOT BLAMING ANYONE HERE. It's just that we are not face to face and we each can only go by whats written here. There is two sides to every story and sometimes I think we look over that. I am willing to let my son walk his Journey. It's the wait that hurts the most and I SURE don't want to prolong that.