I believe that MWD does not recommend exposing an A to the OP's spouse.
Personally, I have seen too much domestic violence, including murder / suicide due to infidelity. In my small community of around 3,000 people, this affects everyone directly.
It is always your choice to make. The question is, are you ready for the consequences that responsibility will hold on you? Including all the people who are also involved...? If they are meant to find out, they will anyhow...
