Sun, first of all, this is still a place that one can come to for help. Some of the people that were on are not now, but, there are still wonderful people here.
We are here to help, but, that doesnt mean that we are just going to tell you what you want to hear. That wouldnt serve much purpose though, right?
The object if for us to get each other to think and to push sometimes when someone is stuck.
And sometimes when we feel that perhaps the person might not be hearing us, we tend to back off for a bit because it's not really helpful to them and it can be frustrating for us.
You still cant understand how your xh can still be so angry. And that serves no purpose. He is how he is. That's it.
That being said, I hear what you are saying. I do. I get the financial part all too well.
Here's the thing. The financial part and the divorce part are separate from your son. While he was obviously affected by the divorce, he has no part in what transpired between the two of you. Nor does he have any part in anything not settled between the two of you.
Your son knows you love him. He knows what is true and what is not. But think about it. If he is afraid of his father, doesnt that tell you that he knows his shortcomings. He knows who he is. But he needs to be with his father right now.
Your son, by virtue of his age, is still trying to figure life out. He is trying to understand things. And for right now, he needs to be with his dad in order to do that.
He has given you strong signs that he needs for you to not try to get in touch with him. Sweetie, I can only imagine how much it hurts not to see your son. But, I know you love him enough to give him the room he needs to find his way.
As far as worrying about what your son will think about you going to court? You do what is right for you.
Give your son credit. He knows deep down. He does, Sun. Let him see a woman who is strong.
And AJ is right, if you dont fight for what is yours, he might think his father is right.
Sun, hard as it is, you have to let your son walk his journey. As a mother, that is the greatest gift you can give him. He knows just where to find you when he's ready.
