The cynic in me is creeping up, and I hear myself saying, "Whoever the EA was, that must be over now." DB was true - it doesn't have to last long if you back off entirely. I remind myself to give myself credit for doing all the DB work - and it was/is HARD work.
As a result of DB, I do feel a lot more in control of myself. I have no certainty that we will get back on track, or even IF he wants to truly repair. Time will tell. But I would say that DB definitely helps loads.
The whole, giving the S space, is the first step and probably most important, particularly as it is counter-intuitive. MWD knows her stuff, and I will continue to use the hard-earned lessons in many aspects of my life.
I went to see a friend today. I didn't know this, but she told me that for some reason, she manages to attract married men, and they try to pick her up. Fortunately, she's strong enough to tell them to get lost all the time, but still from her perspective, the M is vulnerable which is why this sort of thing happens regularly in her opinion.
Yes, our R was vulnerable, but we were also in the process of repairing and creating a constructive process. Sigh.
Still, this 'time out' has given me time to consider what I really want in a relationship, and how that might shape any future relationship I involve myself in.
So time alone can be a good thing, if one uses the time wisely.
