I just want to be friends...Pt2

[breakdownbill]

Yankee

I'm really glad that you did that for your H about the flowers and judging from how it went it probably made you feel a lot better about the situation as well.

You're definitely right when you state you know your H & that flowers are his thing, with all the flower sending. If that's his thing, it isn't so bad (could be a lot worse), but I totally understand when something becomes predictable it loses its effect.

It doesn't have much to do with the 'friend'. I'm not so young (anymore) nor naive to think this other person is the answer to all my prayers. HARDLY!

This sounds almost word for word what my W said about the OM when I called her on it, it's like it could be a script ;-)

YC, I wouldn't think any less of you if you did throw the towel in - 2 years is a hell of a long time to be stuck in limbo. I question my staying power sometimes & it's only been 2 months for me.

I think I'll have a completely different outlook on my sitch if I do move out. At the moment, things are good at home for me (superficially at least), my kids are happy, me and my W get on great & we are having lots of incredible sex. But I'd be lying to myself if I thought that was enough, emotionally it's just not there between us yet. This is hardly surprising as at the moment the plan is still to separate in May, so I'm pretty much a friend with benefits to my W, she is not committed to our R and doesn't wear her rings anymore.

I think this shows how far I've come in such a short space of time, that on paper, I'm only one part of a relationship short (well 2 if you throw the trust in there) & it's not enough for me anymore.

Patience and trust are hard commodities to acquire when you've been cheated on and received a bomb saying that your W doesn't want to be with you anymore. If I didn't love my W and my family I would have walked after learning about the above.

I'm in it for the long haul and I'm so grateful to this forum for being here, helping each other along the way.

I know you love your H YC, that's why you are still here plugging away - hang in there chief.

Bill