the OW will be in the picture until the picture you create becomes more attractive
Right now, she is placing NO pressure on him she is validating him in everything she is kind and considerate and the perfect girlfriend there is no expectation from her for him to be anything other than what he is now
remember when you 1st started dating him (or someone else)? How excited you were to see them? how you always shaved your legs and smelled nice and things were clean and you were always happy and accomodating?
there were no bills no messes in the house nothing smelled bad no one was tired and cranky
that is what she is right now
she doesn't expect him to bear his soul and make their relationship solid
she is still wooing him
woo him
my parents have been together for forever
they still woo each other
my dad goes out of town for business and my mom always is waiting when he gets home with a clean house, candles lit, supper made and smelling like his favorite perfume
she tucks little love notes in his bag
he writes I love you in the steam on the mirror during his shower and surprises her with favorite chocolates, just because
they woo each other
of course there are days when they are tired and snipe at each other or stink or whatever
but
they remember the wooing
remember the girl you were and how excited he made you remember when you 1st started dating but weren't super serious (so he MIGHT have been dating other girls...no commitments were made but you WANTED him to only be dating you)
remember those people and try to recapture some of those moments
just some
it is important for all of us to remember to live some of those moments out all the time
