Thanks for responding ogda & jstx. This has been going on for 8 months & I really thought we had made a breakthrough. Before the moving home part, it was just kind of being in limbo & seeing how it went. We were talking, spending time together etc. Now, I haven't talked to him in days except when I saw him at work yesterday morning. I miss him & I think worse now since we were back to being involved in each others lives again every day. It is more like it was when he 1st moved out & said there was no chance for us.
He has said many things that I know have just been lashing out. He even admits it when we have meaningful conversations. He says he just does it to make me mad. But, I know that if I was to say I want a divorce, he would say okay, no problem. Sometimes I think that is what he is waiting for but I keep holding on because I truely don't think he wants it deep down. He just told me that last week- said he just says it to make me mad. At least that gives me some hope.
I know I need to detach. I was actually getting better at it for awhile, until he started being around again more often. I don't really talk alot about what is going on w/ him to my friends & family - they all think he is a jerk & think I can do better or would be better off by myself. But, I love him & have seen more of the good than they have. I realize how it looks from the outside but people are starting to make comments now about me not filing for D, etc. I know they just want me to be happy, but I just listen & then come home & lurk on here or read my books.
Thanks again for posting to me. I know what I have to do, it is just not always easy to do it.
