Just had a chance to do a 180. My H goes to see the orthopedist on Thursday about his knee. He went in to work today around 8:30 am, and his knee was bothering him by the time I got to work around 10:30 am. I told him to try and ice it and not walk to much. He rides the train to work and stands up most of the trip. He should probably just drive there, but parking in the city can be an issue and EXPENSIVE.
I talked to him around 2 pm and he told me he had checked on how to get short-term disability. Here's where the 180 comes in: H and I have always had disagreements about money. It stems from when he first moved in with me from NC and it took him a LONG time to find a job. Like MONTHS. I didn’t handle that very well. Okay, I didn’t handle it well at all. I became very bitter and kind of disgusted at him being home everyday doing nothing. (Cleaning included!) And we couldn’t afford it. We struggled for the first year of marriage trying to catch up financially from his unemployment.
Anyway, back to the 180. He would need to be out of work for 8 consecutive days before he’s eligible for disability, which would mean using his remaining leave and LWOP. I validated his feelings about possibly needing short-term disability, and told him that if that’s what he felt he needed to do I was okay with it. I’m actually surprised at how I handled it. Before, I would have come up with any other option besides him being out of work. Every man in my family has worked since they were young, and when they were not at work, they worked at home doing something. According to my grandfather: A man don’t work…he don’t eat. LOL (Love my Southern roots!)
We are WAY better off financially and I can basically take care of the household by myself if I need to. Not the case before, which stressed me out and didn’t help my feelings toward him about it. I feel like this was a chance to show him some of my changes without making a big deal about it. I’m really learning not to sweat the small stuff. It’s WAY easier than I would have ever thought.
