Parenting with an MLCer (and other things ) Part 2

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Kimmerz,
Please try to remember that mlc is about emotions/feelings and when they are in crisis, their personalities can change on a dime and give you nine cents change. Sometimes, the spew is not actually about you or something you have done, but another outside source could have rocked his world and you happen to be the first one in his line of vision...thus the spew.

Mlcers like to use children as go betweens w/the lbs. You know the drill w/your children, i.e., one will put the other one up to go as mommy if so and so can do this or we can go there. This could very well be what you are dealing w/your man/child.

As for divorce and the dust settling...it does happen and people can put aside the arguments about finances and the what nots or how comes that require a divorce and get on w/life. I noticed that once my divorce took place, things actually settled down w/my xh once he received his settlement from the home and went on his merry way. I didn't hear from him again for about 3 1/2 years and he actually acted like a civilized human being. As for the lbs, a huge weight is lifted once a divorce takes place because you then know that he/she can't manipulate and/or control you any longer. You come to realize that all of the sparring over finances, property, assets, etc. should be over and done with and the dust settles and you can then focus on you, your family and your future.

Some people actually do become friends w/their ex-spouses. I remain civil w/mine, but I'm not jumping through hoops to be his friend because the term "friend" still doesn't mean to him what the description of friends is. In time, you will need to make the decision as to whether you actually want to be friends w/your h, if your should divorce, or just civil because of the girls. Right now, that decision doesn't need to be set in concrete. Just focus on the here and now.

Happy Easter and I do hope the eggs turn out beautiful and the girls have a great day!