Well now I had no problem setting up my tent last summer!
You know there are now huge family tents made now that are just pure pop up tents....No rejection involved! Lol.. just kidding!
T^2..In regards to the clarity after divorce is getting close to done...what kind of clarity do you think a person has? I am having clarity too, but my clarity does not give me the desire to connect with him. It just makes me want to walk on and start living my life the way I always wanted to.
The legal assistant at my attorneys office said the same thing to me a couple of months ago. She said that once things start to get to the end stage of the game, the other tends to see things differently. A mutual friend who's been divorced said once the divorce is over things get better and you can work on being friends.
I guess Im just too black and white. Divorce means DONE to me, not my next chance to rekindle a friendship he threw away in the first place. Done means you have your life, I have mine, and we only communicate in regards to exchange of kids, and any issues they may have. PERIOD. I've worked very hard to change my mentality to "that was then, this is now". And the last thing I expected him to do was come soaring in like Captain America to save the day, when he was just acting like Incredible Hulk to tear me down.
I know him as two different people, so I guess that's why I get confused and wrapped up in things that I no longer need to bother myself with. He does wear his heart on his sleeve, so actions always speak louder than words, especially for him. I've found him to be more of an extra sensitive type of man, that finds ultimate rejection in things I couldn't dream of if I wanted to. He's ashamed of that, so he hides it and tells himself to get over it and grow up. He told me he does this. But stuffing and avoiding conflict all his life has led to him turning into Incredible Hulk. When the surge of anger is over...he's about as sweet, tender and loving as a puppy...towards everyone.
Then I know him to be this completely self absorbed teenager that only has his best interests at heart, even before MLC started. And I guess that's where I've become so disappointed. I just wanted so much the good in him to stay, for it was that good I fell in love with over and over so many times.
His ever changing personalities has worn me thin, yet his behavior seems so interesting to me I can't help but wonder what the heck is going on with him. But I also know it's time for me to just do that last bit of detatchment and get to the point I don't care why he does what he does or says anymore.
The thought of a new relationship with someone that's stable in the moods and personalities sounds like a vacation on a tropical island to me. I think I might be approaching almost "ready" to going on a date. But at the same time Im ok being single too.
KML.... thank you so much for sharing in regards to what happened to your daughter. Im sorry I didn't reply to this earlier, I just found your post. I appreciate you telling me details in how your daughter was hiding it. As of what I can tell, right now she's on the straight and narrow, healhty way of losing weight. She's cut out alot of junk food, and has worked on portion control. She's joined track and is excercising.
What does concern me...she is a big girl and it's now starting to become inconvienent to her. She compares herself to others, and talks alot about how she doesn't like certain parts of her body. I've talked with her about eating disorders. Right now Im concerned that she's walking the fine line of either working on weight loss and eating healhty for the right reasons, or getting obsessed and going down the bad path of eating disorders. Right now she appears on the right path...and all I can do is encourage, praise, encourage, and be vigilant in watching for signs of eating disorders.
Kaffe...yes life gets in the way. How it's handled is the basis of a make or break relationship. If you realize it's happening, do something about it. If your partner won't connect over it due to punishing you, their loss. I think it all comes down to it taking two to make it work, and if the other won't at least try to be on the same page, well it's a lost cause!
Happy Easter Everyone! Im going to die eggs and have a good time this weekend. Is Anyone planning on an Easter Feast? The girls love ham...perhaps I should cook one for tomorrow. Yes Ham and scalloped potatoes sounds so good.
Hope everyone is well... I've grown to love you all!
