The only things she has done without me is hanging out with one of her work friends and she brings the kids. She does not drink when she goes out and is in bed by 9:00 p.m. most nights. The last time she went out for drinks with friends was years ago.
I am trying. W is sick and was supposed to pick up the kids at Y-Care after work since I dropped them off. I told her that I would pick them up and take them to dinner so she could sleep. I don't want a sick W in FA.
W and I talked today about R. She stated that the fact that I am helping more with the finances has made her madder than when I did not help her. And that if I did this earlier then we would not be where we are currently are.
How can I work on romance when my W has a wall between us?
Yes, I've heard this one too.
And, I'm also curious about how to get past their wall - but then I have my own wall up now too. It's very sad.
LOVE is unconditional. RELATIONSHIPS -- especially married relationships -- are very much conditional, and there's nothing that says we have to (or even should) respond to a spouse's unfaithfulness or walk-away'dness with our unconditional love, trust and support. Our spouses begin to value us when we learn to better value ourselves -- and no sooner.
Starsky
I think I will print and put that on my wall - great reminder!!
You are amazing in your advice too. You make it all sound so under control. Thanks for your perspective.
Thanks, Yankee. It's always easier when you're on the outside of the turmoil, looking in. I had others provide that perspective for ME, and so now I just try to "pay it forward," as it were.
