Indecision and the affair continues (part 3)

[Nblost]

Walking, you are so nice. I definitely don't feel like I am as strong as you think I am! I guess I am finding my way. I really do feel more empowered now that I'm taking action. I couldn't handle living like this anymore. I think everyone gets there at different points. I'm far from perfect though.

Your perspective is so interesting. H claims OW knows the truth, but I can't believe she does. He got the most angry during this "ordeal" when I said I should just call and talk to her about how she's feeling about things. I agree it's hard to know where this will end up...but I do feel good that I've mostly taken the high road. H has recently viewed me as taking "the offensive" against him...and I have gotten more angry at him recently. But, I also think he's trying to get me to back down and be nicer again.

What's interesting is that through my detaching from H...I really don't feel like I care about them anymore (until my kids are at risk for getting sucked in).

I have really felt like contacting OW at moments...but I am above contacting her. I just feel like I don't want to stoop to their level. At Christmas I told H that I felt like I was in a group of three losers and I was going to be the first one to get out.

I guess the more I see H acting like this...the more I think she can have him!

Thanks again for your note! It means a lot.