Funny... if you were on this side of the border... I'd probably know you...
OK, let me relate my story in short form, if I can:
I find good buddy of mine in bed, under the covers with my W...
Sounds bad...
But, the deal is, he and a few other friends spent the night over after a bender...
I had been working and needed to work early the next morning, so W had made a bed in basement for me... that's another story that seems quite disrespectful to me, but...
So I wake up, grab a shower and go to the room to get my fresh clothes and that is what I see...
But I also see that he is fully clothed... as my W, at least, has a night gown on... I can make assumptions and use my imagination, but that is what I see... at most, they are having pillow talk and it could just as easily be something about him having women problems...
But rather than anyone admitting that perhaps that was inappropriate and at least validating how I could have seen that in a negative way...
Everyone began defending, saying it's not what it looks like (if it wasn't a problem, if it wasn't inappropriate then how could it look wrong is my unasked question). Suggesting that only moments earlier, there were about 8 people in the bed...
I get it... a bunch of people having fun...
So anyhow, the point is... and there are other reasons for me to suspect even more, but same... circumstantial evidence... the reality of that moment... is that nothing was going on... that I jumped to conclusions...
While I think my buddy was trying to connect with me after that, possibly to re-affirm that nothing happened and possibly even ask for forgiveness and validate my thoughts and concerns... it never happened... and now, after all the contrived stories and siding that have taken place... I have been segregated from that entire crew and they from me...
Probably a good thing... but the story likely still stands... nothing happened... I was "wrong" to jump to conclusions... and it is none of my business anyhow, because my W didn't feel M by then...
Last weekend, I stopped by buddy's place to finally just let that go in me. He wasn't there, I sent him an email...
Your friend could tell you the truth, and that they were just talking about nothing... or he could lie... and tell you they were just talking about nothing... or he could be honest and tell you they were talking trash... or he could be spiteful and hurtful and lie, because he's sided with your W in her desire to move on, and tell you he slept with her... just to get your goat...
What you do is up to you. All I can offer is, if you do confront him, be very, very sure that your emotions are in check... you don't need a farming / auger accident in the local papers, eh?
