Hi Guys, Thanks so much Snodderly and Warrior for getting me back on track.
Im starting to really understand that now, that there was absolutely nothing I could do to prevent this from happening.
I think what hits all us LBS so strongly is that the MLCer/WAS tells us that WE ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THEIR UNHAPPINES AND REASON FOR LEAVING. If we had done a,b,c, etc. then they would be happy and not want to leave. But too late now, even if you start doing a,b,c, etc, too little too late, no use, no interest in mending the marriage. Sorry it's all your fault!
We take the scorn, criticism, accusations, and blame. Do that to a fixer type personality with a few co dependent issues, and Wow...here we taking complete blame for our marriages falling apart and feeling huge guilt.
I've decided NOT to invited stbx over to easter. He's starting in with an irritable mood swing and is acting like he's frustrated with me. I have no idea why he's acting this way...and for the first time in over a year, I DON'T CARE. He's due for a mood swing anyway. It seemed he'd be doing great for 3 months and be present in or lives, and then after 2 or 3 months down the rabbit hole again. Irritable, distant, and complaining of aches and pains. Found out last week from stbx he was having a migraine. Migraine's always seem to go hand in hand with his mood swings, especially after his head injury.
