Dagnabit!

[zig]

I wasn't suicidal but I was dying a slow and unhappy death. I was simply going through the motions of living life, too afraid of losing "control" to love, to have fun, to enjoy the beautiful things this life has to offer.

are you, like, my twin or something?


Pain happens, it's a part of life but the more I hide from pain the more I miss the good things life has to offer. I controlled in order to keep pain and hurt at bay. By putting up a wall around the vulnerable part of me, I also walled out joy, happiness, love...


something i've been thinking about recently - that h is mirroring now what i was until i woke up. your words above fit me so well until the bomb, and now they fit h so well....

i'm glad you picked that book up again. i am rereading 'The wisdom of no escape" again after several months and the chapter on renunciation really is relevant now. it's like you said - only ready to absorb it when you're ready to do it

i'm sure in a few months when i read it agin, it will be from a very different place.

learning to trust the path and not the goal - i'm just starting to realize is the point and what i should aim for, and in doing that the goal becomes irrelevant.

one thing to know it and write it down, quite another to practice it from second to second.

i love that you quoted here, and shared with all of us. each moment that i am functioning from a compassionate place, is one more moment that i am my higher self