Brand New here, my story, my ?'s

[2thepoint]

Hey ICH - just got caught up on your sitch and see many similarities to mine. The fact that your W is having second thoughts I think is a good thing. It suggests that some of your efforts are paying off. Of course events also have a way of creating doubt in people's minds (i.e. the letter form her mom, the OM and his doubts, etc.).

My best advice for you at this time is to continue to validate, but don't push. Be sure you are truly owning up to your role in the marital problems and make sure you don't regress. Any meaningful 180's that you've done need to continue so that she will feel that a future with you in it will be better than it was before.

I find it a bit strange for me that although I think overall I would want to work with my W on building a new R together...I think I was getting more and more prepared and comfortable with the impending separation in June and what my life could be like moving forward from that.

This ^^^ suggests to me that you are doing well with your efforts to detach. I wish I could be so comfortable. With time, I suppose I will. But regardless, your growing comfort may also be what is drawing your W back to reality. She may sense you becoming more and more comfortable with the idea of being alone and now she has to think about all that that entails.

Overall I believe I want to work on R with my W because I believe it is the best thing for our kids...I believe we could create love and happiness with each other again...W is not there yet.

It is a delicate dance. You need to take it slow and you must also be sure that this is what you want. You seem a little apprehensive about even wanting to piece back the R. I guess I can see why, but you need to be sure this is what you want.

Good luck!