I didn't see it coming...but now I see everything

[breakdownbill]

I too am not quite ready to

It is a good thing to understand from another's perspective - thanks for pointing that out. I think I had a bad day yesterday because I'm pretty ok today and felt love again in my heart. So, there will always be days of ups and downs, it's the long run that counts

Yes, even though we are not throwing in the towel, we must look after our wellbeings. So, you are right, don't allow yourself to be treated in a way that may lower your self-esteem. It is bad enough feel rejected, but to pile up further injury makes no sense. Of course, if I was completely an enlightened human being, I'd be able to see their current behavior as their lack of vision that is causing them to behave with such insensitivity towards another human being - and then let it roll of this duck's back. But, until that day comes, I will just keep an eye out for myself, as you

You go to uni - well, so do I! I was a total mess when all this started - even started crying at a meeting I had with one of my tutors. I was mortified and thought I was able to keep my personal life separate from my student life. I learned that lesson! Fortunately, I am in the arts, so we get to express a lot through our art and the tutors accept that. Is there anyway of incorporating your current personal sitch into your Uni work? Just an idea to help relieve some of the pressure.

YC

I'm having a good / bad day today YC

I feel more in control of my emotions than I have in a long time. I just really feel bad for my kids - when the time comes for separation, which I think is inevitable - is gonna crush them. Even if I saw them everyday. I'm so hands on with those little guys.

I feel that I really do need to fix myself, be happy again and then decide what I want to do for me. I want to be with the kids as much as physically possible, that is for certain. Not much else in my life apart from getting older is certain.

My tutors at UNI have been great. Today I went to see one of them after my counselling session and she said, 'don't be to down on yourself, your life's sh*t at the moment' I laughed so much at that today.

We have a lot in common YC with our sitch's and I really like sharing what's going on with you.

Here's to better days

Bill