Hey Rick - Good question. I have said before that I would rather lose everything I own with my wife and son with me than prosper without them. One of the lessons I have learned in all of this is that money and "stuff" are not the most important things/pursuits in life. My fear centers around failure mostly, the inability to provide well for myself and my son. The inability to plan for the future financially - college, retirement, and so on. That does not supersede my family, it just lingers as an ongoing anxiety for me in the background.
I sat in church with w and sil today and thought that at times God can be humbling. I am starting to feel that in many ways, from how I communicate to what I value, I am being humbled. Brought back down to Earth. Centered. Broken and given an opportunity to rebuild. If nothing else, this has been humbling and has caused me to take a secondary look at priorities.
Family. It's about family. It's not about having all the answers to the future of how to PROVIDE for that family...just having a family and developing an environment where love and support are the pillars of your home/life. That was a humbling discovery for me. That is why I regret being so afraid to have a second child when that is all I want right now.
Yes, we get broken down in this experience. But I am doing my best to make sure that it is for a PURPOSE and not for me to wallow (which I do at times). Not sure if the breaking down portion of this is over for me yet - maybe that is what the whole financial piece is about. Regardless, I can feel part of the rebuild happening.
