Divorce....with a side of crazy...

[imthemom]

thanks 25...Im actually not as worried as I was now that Ive met with my L and weve started our response...she agreed that there purposal was crazy. There is both an anuity and a pension fund that I will get half of and he is not fighting that...he is mostly fighting the support issues and has added other things, IMO, to have barganing power to that point. He is asking to be reimbursed for my truck payment that he has made since we seperated..(he lived in our house rent free for 2 yrs while it was in short sale so he paid the auto payment and insureance while I paid the credit card bills) Apparently there is law that says I am intitled to half the rate of what rent would have been in that house for 2 yrs...so we have offered to forgo that if he dropped the truck payment..its basically a back and forth to get him to drop his ridiculouse request.

My S21 in his SS...he raised him from the age of 3 but has had no contact with him since Aug. which is sad. they were VERY close. that is one thing that has really hurt me but im keeping emotion out of it. He is legally blind and has cerebral palsey due to a head injury at 6 months of age. He is not a factor in this since he is not his son but he knows (we agreed before we got married) that I work part time to allow me to be home to care for him since he cannot be left alone for long periods of time. I work now, and always have, around his schedule to be home when he gets home from his program and to be home when he is on spring and summer break. That is the whole reason I took this job with the school district 8 yrs ago. It was the perfect fit with S21s schedule. and he was always our first priority.
and at this point, S15 is in no position to be left alone all afternoon with the trouble he has been getting into, STBX knows this also, we have discussed it many times. I have worked part time since we got married 18 yrs ago. and yes he has consistantly brought home 4-5 times the amount I make and ALWAYS includeing OT...tax forms will show that.

My experience with the court system has been for myself (with S21s father) and a friend. My friend actually ended up paying CS to her ex becus he said he could not work full time due to a surgery he had yrs ago on his foot..but he was able to do other things with no problem. She did not have the money to fight it and he did...eventually she got the S dropped but not until after she struggled for years and had to work long hrs in order to support herself her kids and him...I know that doesnt always happen, but my ex also dragged me into court every chance he could to fight for custody of my S21 (he did not like paying support either) and thankfully my STBX made enough for us to fight him everytime. but it cost a fortune and we would always agree to drop his support amount to get himto drop the custody issue...

And everything that my ex did, that my STBX hated so much, is exactly what my STBX is doing now....from not being there as a dad to not wanting to support him. Obviousely I am looking at why I am ending up with these kind of men...and yes I am working on that everyday!!!! that is my concern now, working on me and being a better person with a lot more commen sense and a lot more self worth.