New Day Rising

[greatwhitenorth]

So I just got the call from H's friend who wants to pick up his rifle. We had a great chat. He only found out yesterday that H and I are separated.

I asked him if H told him what happened, and he said no, that he simply said "we're not together anymore" and skipped right over it to the next topic of conversation. I did not tell the friend about the affair, but I did say that he just walked out, that I never had a chance. He said it was was "unf'ing believable" and that he's shocked. I told him I was glad to hear that because it's the first time I've heard it from a friend of H's. The person H stayed with initially alluded to this, but I haven't talked to the others at all.

The friend hasn't talked to H is quite a while, but he said that every time they spoke, H said things were great, going really well. H was happy. He said that with me, H really turned things around and had a great life. The friend can't believe H has walked away from everything. I told him I love my husband, but what are you going to do? You have to move forward. We agreed that whatever is going on with H is pretty deep for him to have abandoned his life this way.

I didn't get upset or dwell on anything. We mostly talked about friend's life. I congratulated him on his new work and we talked about his family. I said it was fantastic the way his life has become everything he ever wanted it to be.

Don't know if this conversation will get back to H or not, but I guess it doesn't matter because in essence I am done. I can't remain in a self-imposed limbo.

But I will continue to be the person I want to be and am at my core - loving, strong, supportive, optimistic, generous, independent and very, very happy.