Never thought I'd be here..........Part 12

[bustorama]

She also might be not thinking altogether clearly.

Crimson, this is a time when you need to think and express about what your boundaries of living are. If you aren't comfortable moving forward with IVF in this context, hold onto your nuts and speak up.

If you are not OK with doing IVF while divorce is imminent or, as gabby said, while divorce is still fresh in your rear view mirror, it is fine to talk about YOUR RESERVATION in MC or to W. Note that this is very different than telling her she needs to do something.

You do NOT say, W, you need to decide what you want. If you want IVF, you need to withdraw this D petition.

You DO say, W, It has been [adjective, exciting, hopeful, etc.] for me to go to these IVF visits with you, and it is something that I am excited about. I want to be honest with you though that I'm not sure if this is the right timing for me. I wouldn't be comfortable doing IVF just right now when we are still figuring out where we stand with each other. How do you feel about this?

Some of the pressure comes when you make it all about HER and HER decision and HER needing to do something. Take the pressure off her by making it about YOU and your boundaries and your own choices. It also empowers you.