Of course you know Sem, the conversation you had was probably neither harmful nor helpful to the sitch... but... at least you told her how you felt (in the moment) rather than keeping it bottled in. Maybe she "got it" and maybe she didn't, but if it helped you to get it out... great...
It is interesting how they rationalize. My W (who may or may not be MLC) got a new car when we split. I admit, she needed one. She got it from her mom and it was a sporty little "young number" that (honestly, in my opinion) did not suit her. But... she was happy and her rationale was that she needed a new car, it was in good shape and it was cheap, because she bought it from her mom... and not because she might be MLC and buying a car that she thought suited her "youthful lifestyle" she had chosen.
The point to the above is, (an accident, which probably messed up the frame) and a year later, my W has a new car... if there's any indicator that a MLCer transitions through the stages in life during their MLC, this could be it... she bought what most certainly could be a van... something that someone who is starting a new family, with young kids but still an active lifestyle might purchase... her rationale is, her (now) old car was horrible on the roads and this new vehicle actually cost her nothing (because she managed to do an even trade)... of course, in the language of trade in value, she is still down due to the depreciation of her car over the last year...
So what point am I trying to make? I guess I'm just really saying that yes, they can and will rationalize to say they're making good choices. If we were living in their world, we might do the same, with or without having MLC. I have a new (old luxury) car which I have many rationalizations for purchasing.
I hope that you are in a good place and able to have vented... and let those things go...
It does sound like you are in a good head space right now, though. And from what I've seen (but can't confirm) is that those who are post D actually DO get that "spark", so I'd suspect that will happen for you, as well... although you don't have to wait for the spark to at least go out on dates and practice your social skills...
