I agree that you should not give up your comfort level. She's broken her vows, and started an A, not you. She is, in essence, controlling your life by doing so, since you have no choice in this. She made a promise when she got married, had a family with you, and you had every belief (as we all had) that that would continue. She broke it. If she was unhappy, she should've said so, and turned to you and try and work it out. Instead, she turned away from her M to OM. How can she possibly justify anything now? And being "afraid" of you ... what, she can't speak up for herself, after all these years being married to you? If she had father issues, she should've gone to counseling, not started an A.
You are handling this very well, IMO. Yes, it's probably not a good idea to let her vent about OM, but if one thinks about it ... it's almost like you have become the OM, so she may find a certain attraction to that. I am glad you are letting her face the consequences of her choices. So many men on here tend to leave to "give their wives their space". And, they end up without their children, in some tiny apartment, OM in their beds, believing they were being the gentleman by leaving. I disagree with them vehemently. Now is not the time to be a gentleman ... now is the time to be a husband who is seeking to save his M, or himself.
Bleh, I've gone on a bit. I'll end it now. Take care.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
