I didn't see it coming...but now I see everything

[breakdownbill]

Stop talking to her over the phone! Stop asking her if she's okay. Stop calling her babe! Do you not see how that is pursuing?

Don't discuss the counseling session.

Hi Sandi - I admit that I need to stop calling her babe, force of habit - I've been calling her this for 12 years. I never called her, but I didn't have to answer the phone though & will make a conscious effort to stop checking if she is ok in situations like that. I never wanted to discuss the counselling session - my wife was pursuing that curiosity on her part - but I should have been firm like avinda said.
I've just got home from dancing and I feel a bit flat now - last week my lesson I was on a high & really enjoyed it, but this week although good was bitter sweet & as I was leaving I felt an awful trigger of my W with OM. This is so hard - I'm not going to give up, but I've got so much hurt at the moment, I feel that my emotions are really screwing me up. I know I need to focus on me & I really am trying to. I keep asking myself the same question why do I even want to be someone who is doing this to me? I know the answer but the truth hurts.

Thanks Sandi - I really do appreciate your advice & just hope I can be strong enough to keep it together.