Hi there, just thought I'd leave an update from my Counselling session today. It was really good for me to get off my chest a lot of the feelings I had inside of me & I think we made some good progress & got to one of the roots as to when my M started to break down. Back in 2004, me, W and D less than 1 at the time, were living in our first house W wasn't working & I was full time in the day time. We spent every night together and weekends as a family and were really close and happy. I wanted a bigger house and pushed for a move, which we did 12 months later and then we got into lots of financial trouble. Wife had to work part time evenings & I had to work during the day. We saw less and less of each other and when we did talk it was about stressful or unromantic things. This led to a breakdown in communication and subconciously a detachment on my part. Instead of dealing with our issues I ignored them - and my wife handled them badly and became controlling & dictative in conversations, so I just avoided them. It hasn't all been bad over the last 7 years, but things have never been so good during that year 2004. Now that I have an idea as to what started these events & when we were last genuinely happy it is something to reflect on for me personally. I'm not going to just blame myself, but I need to appreciate & understand fully my role in all of this mess, to move on either way.
It's a real start and with more counselling I hope to make more progress. Still waiting for DR & DB books, but trying to detach as much as possible whilst staying friendly & positive.
Me 34 W 32 D 9 S 6 M: 9 years T: 12 Bomb: 02/11/12 EA/PA: 12/17/11 - ongoing Moved out: Oct 2012 Joint Filed for D: 2/11/13
